Song 99

I will become easily upset when others fail me on their words, particularly about punctuality.  When the person failed to come to receive me in the railway station and as I had to wait for a long time for him, then I was raging within me about such lack of discipline.  Though I resisted my anger knowing that he didn’t do it intentionally, still I had to fight a good fight with my spirit and flesh to overcome such shortcomings.  The same happened another time at Bangalore as I had to wait outside the station  [more than three hours], unable even to go to the restroom waiting for that person.  The same happened in Dheradun another time.  Those days we didn’t have mobile phones to contact quickly. So there was no other option but to wait for our host to come and pick us in the place where he asked us to wait.  In those time when I rage within me, then I reflect on my lack of patience in life.

99 A continuing story

How long

Such life will go

When the desires of my heart

Will come to an end

Who will win?

Is not the question here

As all the success which I receive so far

Nothing but mere defeat of my heart

As the atman has to fight

With the flesh each day

Both success and defeat

Became a continuing story

Kolkata, 7-2-1999, 7.30 p.m.

99  ஒரு தொடர் கதை

எத்தனை நாள் செல்லும்

இத்தகைய வாழ்க்கை

எப்போது முடியும்

என்மனத்தின் வேட்கை

வெல்வது யார் என்ற

கேள்விக்கே இடமில்லை

நான் கண்ட வெற்றியெல்லாம்

என் மனதின் தோல்விகளே

ஆவியோடு மாமிசமும்

அன்றாடம் போராட

தோல்வியும் வெற்றியும்

தொடர்கதை ஆனதே

Kolkota, 7-2-1999, 7.30 p.m.