BT Song 1226
See: Oh My God Part Four
BT Song 1226: I am a Fool
Simple English
I am a fool,
What can I do?
I found out,
What else can I do?
Not knowing
How to understand,
I wait for you
To show the way.
Reading too much
Is not useful,
Even observing
Is not enough.
I try to learn
From the wise ones
Who have mastered
The art of learning.
I fail
To learn on my own,
Though others help,
I become useless.
I stopped trying
To do more,
I came to you,
Becoming poor.
You know
What I need,
You understand
My longing.
Come in a
Simple way,
Come and
Live within me.
You don’t need to speak,
You don’t need to show actions,
You don’t need to help
My mind realize.
Only my soul
Should understand,
Reaching a state
Beyond everything.
Even renouncing that,
Going beyond,
Give me the state
I can’t describe in words.
Mathigiri, 6-8-2020, 11:00 p.m.
BT Song 1226: I am a Fool
Classical English Version
I am a fool,
What may I do?
This I discerned,
What else may I pursue?
Not knowing
The way to perceive,
I wait for thee
The path to reveal.
Reading abundantly
Holds no use,
Nor does observation,
To reduce my muse.
I strive to understand,
By no other means,
From the learned sages,
Masters of all scenes.
Alone I falter,
Failing to learn,
Though others assist,
Useless I turn.
No longer striving,
To do yet more,
I came to thee,
A beggar, poor.
Thou knowest my need,
Understandest my yearning,
Come simply,
Within me abiding.
Thou needn’t speak,
Nor actions convey,
Thou needn’t aid
My intellect’s play.
Only my soul
Must comprehend,
Reaching a state
That transcends all end.
Renouncing all,
Beyond even that,
Grant me the state
No language can relate.
Mathigiri, 6-8-2020, 11:00 p.m.
BT Song 1227
Compared to other elderly people, both my mother and I enjoy a relatively calm and quiet life. Of course, there are small health issues, which are common at our age. However, my mother is a bit upset because one of her favorite TV serials will be broadcast at 10:00 p.m. instead of 8:30 p.m. Though I am happy about it, not wanting to disappoint her, I began recording it for her to watch the next day—an extra task for me. For this, I am rebuked by my brother and sister, who say I am pampering my mother too much and spoiling her. But keeping an active old woman engaged is a big challenge, so I have to do it. Otherwise, she will sit and lament that time is not moving and will complain that I have books to read. She too reads four books a week, which I bring from the library. Overall, we enjoy our retired life. Though I am thankful to the Lord, sometimes I feel that I miss something in life, even though I don’t know what it is. Only the Lord knows. So when I thank God for such a calm life, a corner of my heart is curious about what I might be missing. Even though I cannot guess it and the Lord is not going to reveal it, as He knows better about me than I know about myself and will always keep my welfare in His mind, I can trust and continue to live with this curiosity. Therefore, I need not ask others for anything or seek their help in finding out what I am missing.
In most TV serials in India, there is domestic violence against women, perpetrated by other women, while men either remain mute spectators or act as pawns in a game. I wish our government would do something about it. Though I put in earplugs and play loud classical music on my computer and lock my room, my mother, who has a hearing problem, turns up the TV volume, and I am forced to hear it—particularly when I go to prepare our dinner. One thing I hate in life is TV serials, and I wish to have a life without them. They are worse than mosquitoes and stray dogs in my life. The only consolation is that my mother watches only three serials and not all of them, particularly during the daytime.
BT Song 1227: When You Are There
Simple English Version
When I have
A need,
To whom shall I go
And ask for it?
When I don’t know
How many needs
Exist
In my life,
When I am frustrated,
Not knowing
Which one to mention
And which one to omit,
When you
Provide the need
That is
Right for the moment,
I realize
That I don’t need
To ask
Anyone for anything.
But when I think
You refuse
To give
One specific thing,
No matter how much I wonder
What it might be,
I cannot
Find the answer.
I clearly understand
That the time
Has not yet come
To know that.
When I think
I have one need
That even I
Don’t know about,
Whatever it might be,
I know for sure
That it will be
Good for me,
Because you
Know me better than I do
And care for me
More than I do.
Lacking
That trust in myself,
I came only
Trusting you.
As you are there
For me,
Why should I go
And ask others?
Mathigiri, BT Song 12-8-2020, 11:50 p.m.
BT Song 1227: When You Are There
Classical English Version
When I have
A need,
To whom shall I go
And ask for it indeed?
When I know not
How many needs
Exist
Within my life,
When in frustration,
Not knowing
Which to mention
And which to omit,
When thou dost
Provide the need
That is
Right for the hour,
I perceive
That I need not
Ask of anyone
For anything.
But when I ponder
That thou dost refuse
To grant
One specific thing,
Though I wonder
What it may be,
The answer
I cannot find.
I clearly see
That the time
Has not yet come
To reveal that.
When I surmise
I have one need
Unknown even to me,
I am sure
Whatever it be,
Only it
Shall be
Good for me,
For thou dost know
Me better than I know myself
And care for me
With greater concern.
Lacking
That within myself,
I came to thee
In trust alone.
As thou art there
For me,
Why should I seek
Others’ counsel?
Mathigiri, BT Song 12-8-2020, 11:50 p.m.
BT Song 1228
There is no particular reason why I wrote this song. In fact, I was not in the mood to write any song. I drastically reduced all my reading and writing activities. I prefer to sit calmly, allowing my mind to wander wherever it wants. I don’t want to draw it back to any particular subject, which would then force me to write something on it. So, when I sat calmly, the first line of this song began to echo in my mind again and again. However much I resisted, I couldn’t avoid it. Then, irritated, I took a piece of paper and wrote this song—without any reason for writing it.
BT Song 1228: Tell Me Directly
Simple English Version
Whatever it might be,
Tell me directly,
Because it’s good
For me to hear.
You don’t need to speak
Indirectly to me,
You don’t need to hide,
Thinking I won’t understand.
Think of how
I’ve shared with you
Whatever I wanted
To share with you.
Did I ever
Hesitate to share?
Was I ever
Afraid to tell you?
Did I ever
Keep quiet,
Thinking you are
The sovereign God?
Did I ever
Try to hide,
Knowing you
Understand my thoughts?
How much I’ve talked,
How much I’ve scolded you,
You know
This very well.
As you gave me
This much right,
Don’t you have
The same with me?
So you
Don’t need to hesitate,
You don’t need
To speak through others.
Tell me anything
Directly,
Who else is there
Who knows me well?
Mathigiri, 13-08-2020, 11:30 p.m.
BT Song 1228: Tell Me Directly
Classical English Version
Whatever it may be,
Speak to me directly,
For it is good
That I should hear.
Thou needst not speak
Indirectly to me,
Nor conceal,
Thinking I cannot comprehend.
Reflect on how
I have shared with thee
All that I wished
To share thus far.
Did I ever
Hesitate to share?
Was I ever
Afraid to speak?
Did I ever
Remain silent,
Thinking thou art
The sovereign God?
Did I ever
Seek to hide,
Knowing thou
Knowest my thoughts?
How much I have spoken,
How much I have scolded thee,
Thou knowest
This full well.
As thou hast granted me
This much right,
Hast thou not the same with me?
Better declare it now.
Thus, thou
Needst not hesitate,
Nor communicate
Through others.
Tell me all
Directly,
Who else is there
That knows me well?
Mathigiri, 13-08-2020, 11:30 p.m.
BT Song 1229
Contentment is the real wealth. I received that in the Lord, though I have some issues with Him. As I enjoy mukti here and now in this life, what else do I require, as that is the longing of every atman? So, as I sit in His presence, there are no words for me to communicate with Him.
BT Song 1229: What is the Need?
Simple English Version
I came to speak
Without words,
I sat
Silent before you.
Not knowing
How to express my thoughts,
I am a little
Confused.
Once you gave
Everything in life
That I needed,
What more can I ask of you?
Once you gave Peace
That my heart cannot grasp,
What more
Can I request from you?
With a bond
Unaffected by separation,
What more
Can I seek from you?
Once you granted
A life I hoped for,
What else
Could be greater than this?
Since you gave
Me the chance
To always think of you,
What more
Can I say to you?
Thus, completing
Earthly life like this,
As I am
Going to be with you forever.
Having received
That life already here,
What more
Is there to discuss with you?
Mathigiri, 15-08-2020, 11:00 p.m.
BT Song 1229: What is the Need?
Classical English Version
I approached to speak
Without words,
I sat
Silent in your presence.
Unsure
How to convey my thoughts,
I am somewhat
Perplexed.
Once thou bestowed
All in life that I required,
What more
May I say to thee?
Once thou granted Peace
Beyond my heart’s grasp,
What more
Could I seek from thee?
With a bond
Beyond knowing separation,
What more
Could I desire from thee?
Once thou bestowed
A life I anticipated,
What more
Could surpass this?
Since thou hast given
Me the privilege
To constantly ponder thee,
What more
Can I articulate to thee?
Thus, concluding
This earthly life thus,
As I am
About to unite with thee forever.
Having already received
That life here,
What more
Is there to converse with thee?
Mathigiri, 15-08-2020, 11:00 p.m.
BT Song 1230
Annihilate your ego to find out who you are—is one of the teachings for self-realization. But as a devotee of the Lord, when I realize that it is no longer I, but the Lord who lives in me, I never remain an empty vessel nor need to kill the so-called ego. Once I become complete in Him, I need not try to empty it again. I never think of empty space in this world, as air fills everything. I have heard about a vacuum, but I cannot understand it. If air is removed by any means from something, then the outside pressure will break it, and the broken parts will again be filled or surrounded by air. I am not a scientist, so I cannot explain this in scientific terms. I am a simple devotee, and I know I am complete in Him. Now I have to live that life of fullness in Him.
BT Song 1230: I am Filled
Simple English Version
There is nothing
Inside me to seek,
No matter how I search,
I cannot find it.
I never learned
The art of
Controlling the mind
To remain silent.
If I place my hand
In an empty vessel,
There is nothing
To collect.
Though the vessel
Is filled with air,
The air
Is invisible to our eyes.
They say
To annihilate the ego (aham),
But I don’t understand
What this ego (aham) is.
Once everything is
Surrendered to you,
There is no separate
Ego (aham) within me.
I attained
The realization of you,
I oriented my senses
To merge with you.
Then I completely lost
Myself,
And there I found
You within me.
Thus,
There’s no need
To empty myself
To find myself again.
Once you fill
The empty vessel,
I am filled,
And there’s no change in this.
Mathigiri, 25-08-2020, 10:45 p.m.
BT Song 1230: I am Filled
Classical English Version
There is naught
Within me to seek,
However I search,
I find it not.
I ne’er learned
The art
To control the mind
And keep silent.
Placing the hand
In an empty vessel,
There is nothing
To grasp.
Though within the vessel
Air doth reside,
To our eyes,
It remains unseen.
They advise
To annihilate the ego (aham),
Yet I grasp not
What this ego (aham) entails.
Once all is
Surrendered unto thee,
No separate
Ego (aham) dwells within me.
I attained
The realization of thee,
I directed my senses
To merge with thee.
Thus, I utterly lost
Myself,
And there I found
Thee within me.
Henceforth,
There’s no need
To empty myself
To rediscover myself.
Once thou dost fill
The empty vessel,
I am fulfilled,
And no change comes hence.
Mathigiri, 25-08-2020, 10:45 p.m.
BT Song 1226 அறியாப் பேதை
அறியாத பேதை
நானென்ன செய்ய
அறிந்திட வந்தேன்
வேறென்ன செய்ய 1
எப்படி அறிவது
என்பது தெரியாமல்
எதிர்பார்த்து நின்றேன்
நீ வழிகாட்ட 2
படித்துப் பயனில்லை
நானதை அறிவேன்
பார்த்தும் பயனில்லை
வேறென்ன செய்வேன் 3
கல்வி கேள்வியில்
சிறந்தவர் சொல்லிடும்
கருத்தினை அறிந்திட
வழியின்றி நின்றேன் 4
சுயமாய் முயன்று
தோல்வியே அடைந்தேன்
பிறர் வந்து உதவியும்
பயனற்றுப் போனேன் 5
எவ்வித முயற்சியும்
இனிச் செய்யாது
ஏழையாய் மாறி
உன்னிடம் வந்தேன் 6
எனது தேவை
நீயும் அறிந்து
எனது ஏக்கத்தை
நீயும் புரிந்து 7
எளிய வழியில்
என்னுள் வந்து
இதயம் தன்னில்
குடிகொள்ள வேண்டும் 8
சொற்கள் மூலம்
சொல்லிட வேண்டாம்
செயலின் மூலமும்
காட்டிட வேண்டாம் 9
அறிவும் அறிய
வைத்திட வேண்டாம்
ஆன்மா உணர்ந்திடும்
வழியும் வேண்டாம் 10
எல்லாம் கடந்த
நிலையை அடைந்து
அதையும் துறந்து
அப்பால் சென்று 11
எம்மொழி கொண்டும்
சொல்லிட முடியா
பேறு தன்னைத்
தந்திட வேண்டும் 12
மத்திகிரி, 6-8-2020, இரவு, 11.00
BT Song 1227 நீ இருக்கையில்
எனக்கொரு தேவை
என்றிடும் போது
எவரிடம் சென்று
நானுமே கேட்பது 1
எத்தனை தேவைகள்
உள்ளன என்று
எனக்குமே சரியாகத்
தெரியாத போது 2
எதைச் சொல்ல
எதை விட
என்றுமே தெரியாது
தவித்திடும் போது 3
அந்தந்த நேரம்
வந்திடும் தேவைகள்
அறிந்துமே நீயும்
தந்திடும் போது 4
எவரிடம் சென்று
ஏதுமே கேட்கத்
தேவையே இல்லை
என்பது புரியுது 5
ஆயினும் ஏதோ
ஒன்றினைத் தந்திட
நீயுமே மறுக்கிறாய்
என்பதை எண்ணிட 6
ஏதாக இருக்கும்
என்றுமே எண்ணி
எப்படி யோசித்தும்
விடையற்ற போது 7
அதற்கான நேரம்
வரவில்லை என்பது
மட்டுமே எனக்கு
நன்றாகப் புரியுது 8
எனக்கே தெரியாத
ஏதோ ஒருதேவை
ஒன்று உள்ளது
என்பதை எண்ணிட 9
எதுவாக இருந்தாலும்
எனக்கது நலமாக
இருக்கும் என்பது
மட்டுமே விளங்குது 10
ஏனென்றால் என்னிலும்
என்னை நன்றாகப்
புரிந்து வைத்துள்ள
உனக்குள்ள அக்கறை 11
என்மீது எனக்கு
இல்லாது போனபின்
அதைமட்டும் நம்பி
உன்னிடம் வந்தேன் 12
ஆகவே எனக்கென
நீயுமே இருக்கையில்
எதற்காகப் பிறரிடம்
நான்சென்று கேட்பது 13
மத்திகிரி, BT Song 12-8-2020, இரவு, 11.50
BT Song 1228 நேராகச் சொல்லு
ஏதாய் இருந்தாலும்
என்னிடம் சொல்லு
ஏனென்றால் கேட்பது
எனக்குமே நல்லது 1
பூடகமாய் நீயும்
பேசிட வேண்டாம்
புரியேன் என எண்ணி
மறைக்கவும் வேண்டாம் 2
இதுவரை உன்னிடம்
நான் சொலும்போது
எவ்வாறு கூறினேன்
என்பதை எண்ணு 3
எவ்விதத் தயக்கமும்
இருந்ததா எனக்கு
சொல்லிட பயமேதும்
வந்ததா எனக்கு 4
எல்லாம் படைத்த
இறைவன் என்பதால்
ஏதுமே பேசாமல்
வாய்மூடி இருந்தேனா 5
இதயத்தின் நினைவுகள்
உனக்குமே தெரியும்
என்றுமே எதையேனும்
நானுமே மறைத்தேனா 6
எத்தனை பேசினேன்
எத்தனை ஏசினேன்
என்பதும் உனக்குமே
நன்றாகத் தெரியும் 7
இத்தனை உரிமை
தந்த உனக்கும்
என்னிடம் உரிமை
இல்லையா சொல்லு 8
ஆகவே வீணாய்த்
தயங்கிட வேண்டாம்
அடுத்தவர் மூலம்
சொல்லிட வேண்டாம் 9
நேரடியாக என்
நெஞ்சுகுச் சொல்லு
நீயன்றி என்னைப்
புரிந்தவர் யாரு? 10
மத்திகிரி, 13-08-2020, 11.30 p.m.
BT Song 1229 தேவை ஏது
வார்த்தைகள் இன்றிப்
பேசிட வந்தேன்
வாய்மூடி மவுனமாய்
உன்முன்னே நின்றேன் 1
எண்ணத்தின் ஓட்டத்தை
எவ்விதம் சொல்வது
என்பது தெரியாமல்
குழப்பமும் கொண்டேன் 2
எவ்விதத் தேவையும்
இல்லாது வைத்தபின்
என்தேவை எதுவென
உன்னிடம் சொல்வது 3
என்மனம் புரியாத
அமைதியைத் தந்தபின்
அதனிலும் மேலாக
எதைநான் கேட்பது 4
பிரிவினை அறியாத
உறவுமே கொண்டபின்
புதிதாக வேறென்ன
நானுமே கேட்பது 5
எதிர்பார்த்த வாழ்வை
எனக்குமே தந்தபின்
இதனிலும் பெரிதாக
வேறென்ன உள்ளது 6
என்நேரம் உன்னையே
எண்ணிடும் பேற்றினைத்
தந்தபின் வேறென்ன
நானுமே சொல்வது 7
ஆகவே இதுபோல
புவிவாழ்வு முடிந்து
நிரந்தரமாக நான்
உன்னுடன் இணைந்து 8
பெறப்போகும் வாழ்வை
இங்கேயே பெற்றபின்
மேற்கொண்டு பேசிடத்
தேவையும் ஏது? 9
மத்திகிரி, 15-08-2020, இரவு 11.00
BT Song 1230 பூரணமடைந்தேன்
என்னுளே தேடிட
ஏதுமே இல்லை
எப்படித் தேடினும்
தெரியவும் இல்லை 1
சித்தத்தை அடக்கி
சும்மா இருக்கும்
வித்தையை நானும்
கற்கவும் இல்லை 2
காலிக் குடத்துள்
கைவிட்டுப் பார்த்தால்
கிடைத்திட அங்கு
ஏதுமே இல்லை 3
காற்று நிரம்பிய
குடமாய் இருந்தும்
கண்ணுக்குக் காற்று
புலப்பட வில்லை 4
அகத்தை அழித்திடு
என்றுமே சொன்னார்
அகமும் எதுவெனப்
புரியவும் இல்லை 5
அனைத்தும் உனக்குள்
அடங்கிய பின்னே
எனக்குள் தனியொரு
அகமுமே இல்லை 6
உன்னை உணரும்
உணர்வினை அடைந்தேன்
உணர்வை உன்னுள்
ஒன்றிட வைத்தேன் 7
அதன்பின் நானும்
என்னை இழந்தேன்
அங்கே என்னுள்
உன்னையே கண்டேன் 8
ஆகவே என்னைச்
சூனியம் ஆக்கி
என்னைத் தேடிட
அவசியம் இல்லை 9
காலிக் குடத்தை
நீயே நிறைக்கப்
பூரணம் அடைந்தேன்
மாற்றுமே இல்லை 10
மத்திகிரி, 25-08-2020, இரவு, 10.45
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