BT Song 1316
As I got up around 2:00 AM and was unable to sleep further due to frequently helping my mother get up from bed, I became very tired. She sought my help at 3:00 AM, 4:00 AM, and then at 5:00 AM. Unable to sleep herself, she asked me to make coffee. So, I prepared her coffee and then had my tea. While drinking my tea, I said to the Lord that for the past several months, I hadn’t sat down to praise Him or write any songs in His honor. Despite wanting to lay down, inspiration struck, and I wrote this song before going back to bed and resting until 6:30 AM.
Sure, here’s the edited version:
BT Song 1316 Which One You Prefer – Simple English Version
1.
Many days have passed
Since I sang your praise,
Now lamenting
Has become my way.
2.
Though you consider
My laments as praise,
I have grown
Weary of these days.
3.
I came ready
To sing your glory,
And I tried my best
To tell your story.
4.
But thinking of
My current state,
I forgot to praise you,
I hesitate.
5.
I asked you
To change my plight,
And I gave all the
Reasons I thought were right.
6.
As you said you
Could do no more,
I became
Very sore.
7.
But you should understand,
Impossible is a word
That with you,
Should not be heard.
8.
You should know that
‘Impossible’, ‘unstable’, ‘tiredness’,
And similar words,
Are my own distress.
9.
You became human
To feel our pain,
And went through trials
Like us, again and again.
10.
Though you
Became a man,
How easily you forget
That you are God, as you can.
11.
Why should you
Listen to all these cries?
Why should you deny
What you are inside?
12.
Knowing what I ask,
And giving it right,
Is your duty,
Both day and night.
13.
Otherwise, only
Songs like this
Will come from me
As praise amidst bliss.
14.
But if you think
This is enough to do,
What else can I say?
I’ll keep on lamenting to you.
Gurukulam, 19-12-2021, 5.00 p.m.
BT Song 1316 Which One You Prefer – Classical English Version
1.
Many days have gone,
Since I sang thy praise,
Lamentation now,
Hath become my ways.
2.
Though thou dost deem,
My laments as praise,
I have grown so weary,
In these endless days.
3.
For I came prepared,
Thy glory to sing,
And endeavored my best,
Thy praises to bring.
4.
Yet thinking on,
My present plight,
I forgot thy praise,
Lost in my night.
5.
I did entreat thee,
To alter my fate,
And gave all reasons,
Why thou shouldst abate.
6.
As thou didst say,
Thou could do no more,
I grew upset,
My heart felt sore.
7.
But thou must know,
‘Impossible’ is a word,
That with thee, my Lord,
Should never be heard.
8.
Thou shouldst know,
‘Impossible’, ‘unstable’, ‘tiredness’ too,
And words akin,
Are but my due.
9.
Thou camest as man,
To share our strife,
Enduring trials,
In mortal life.
10.
Though thou camest,
In human guise,
How dost thou forget,
Thou art God, so wise?
11.
Why dost thou heed,
These plaintive cries?
Why dost thou deny,
Thy divine ties?
12.
To know my plea,
And grant it true,
Is thy duty, Lord,
And rightly due.
13.
Else songs like this,
From me shall pour,
As praise, lament,
Forevermore.
14.
If thou deemest,
This more than enough,
What else remains?
I’ll continue this rough.
Gurukulam, 19-12-2021, 5.00 p.m.
BT Song 1317
After writing the previous song [BT Song 1316], I went to the kitchen to start cooking and began talking to the Lord. During that time, as inspiration came, I realized His frustration in dealing with me and wrote this song to convey what He might be thinking about me. Many times, He has poured out His heart to me in this manner. While I don’t know about others’ experiences, this is true in my bhakti.
BT Song 1317: God’s Reaction
Simple English Version
I know well that
It’s easy to be
The God of the world
For everyone else
But I’ve realized
It’s very hard
To be
Your God
Honestly, I regret
Creating you
The way
You are
But I already understand
There’s no use
In lamenting
About it now
I’ve never listened
To such scolding
And rebuke
Ever before
I found no
Benefit in dying for you
Nor in redeeming
You for me
On top of that,
Allowing you
To write poems
Has become a nuisance
Though I have
Lamented many times
For creating
Your kind
How many times
Must I weep
For creating
You specifically
I tolerate now
Knowing well that
I cannot suddenly
Bring this to an end
Let me watch
With much patience
To see how far
You will go like this
After everything is done,
When you come to me,
I will tell you
The rest of the things
I will take
Revenge for
All that you are
Doing now
Keeping only this
In your mind
Write songs
This is all I can say
Gurukulam, 19-12-2021, 7.30 a.m.
BT Song 1317 The God’s Opposition
classical English style:
Stanza 1
To be the God of town and world,
Is but a task of ease,
This truth, I also know and hold,
With naught but simple peace.
Stanza 2
Yet to be God for thee alone,
Is not an easy feat,
This truth, to me, hath clearly shown,
And now I do repeat.
Stanza 3
For creating thee, in truth,
I now lament with pain,
But knowing this, I see no gain,
In grief that seems so vain.
Stanza 4
Therefore, in knowing thus,
I’ve let go of despair,
And realised, long ago,
This burden I must bear.
Stanza 5
Such speeches and discourses,
Till now, I’ve never heard,
For thee, I died and raised thee up,
With nary a reward.
Stanza 6
Permission granted for thy song,
Now brings me trouble sore,
To write, to sing for thy own kin,
But peace I find no more.
Stanza 7
For after creating thy kind,
So many times I’ve sighed,
And lamented over thee,
With tears that have not dried.
Stanza 8
How many times must I bemoan,
For crafting only thee,
This endless grief, I cannot end,
But suffer quietly.
Stanza 9
To end this tale abruptly now,
I find I have no power,
So patiently, I bear this woe,
And wait each passing hour.
Stanza 10
To see how far thou yet will go,
With patience I endure,
For when thou comest to me at last,
My rest shall then be pure.
Stanza 11
Until that time, thy foolish plays,
I watch with patient care,
And when thou dost return to me,
My judgement shall be fair.
Stanza 12
So keep this truth within thy mind,
And write no more with haste,
For with each line, remember well,
Thy words should not be waste.
Gurukulam 19-12-2021, Morning 7:30
BT Song 1318
After reading the email, I meditated on the subject of Living Dialogue following the receipt of the edited version. Then, I summarized my bhakti in one line in Tamil: “Naadiya Muktiyai Thediye thandai” [You bestowed the mukti I sought by seeking me]. I mean, I was seeking deliverance from various struggles in life, and though I tried various sources, ultimately, God came seeking me through my Guru Muktinath and bestowed it upon me. The main part for me is that HE SOUGHT ME, even though I was not actively seeking Him. Then, as inspiration came, I wrote the following song summarizing my entire bhakti theology, which I try to convey through Living Dialogue.
BT Song 1318: You Bestowed by Seeking Me
Simple English Version
You gave me freedom while seeking me,
Which I was looking for.
You also gave me many
Blessings I didn’t know before.
When I was like a withering plant
Without any water,
You came like rain
And saved me.
I didn’t recognize
Your great love,
Because I lived without
Understanding it properly.
But as you saved me
From perishing,
Only then did I
Understand your love.
You gave me clarity
That many religions
And all their scriptures
Could not provide.
You helped me
Understand life
By living first
And then teaching me.
I lived like a parrot
In a cage,
Unaware of
Its captivity.
You freed me
From that bondage
Which I never
Realized before.
I now experience
That freedom
While still living
In this body.
You help me realize
Its greatness,
Guiding me
Through life.
Though I have
No qualifications
To receive
This noble status,
You became
My qualification,
Living in me
Every day.
As I stand before you,
Without words
To express
My gratitude,
I will guard
The freedom you gave me,
And finally
Reach your holy feet.
Gurukulam, 20-12-2021, 11.15 p.m.
BT Song 1318: Thou Bestowed by Seeking Me
Classical English Version
Thou gavest the mukti seeking after me,
Which I did seek.
Thou also bestowed so many
Blessings unknown to me.
When I did live like a withering plant
Without the water’s grace,
Thou camest as the clouds,
And didst redeem me.
I did not perceive that
Great Love,
As I lived without
Proper sense in life.
But as thou protected me
From perishing,
Then alone I
Realized that love.
Thou didst provide clarity
Which many religions and
Their myriad scriptures
Could not bestow upon me.
Thou didst help me
To understand life’s essence,
By living first,
And then giving teaching.
As I did live
Like a parrot in a cage,
Unaware of
Its captivity,
Thou didst redeem me
From that bondage
Which I did never
Realize before.
As I now experience
That mukti,
Whilst living
In this mortal form,
Thou dost help me
To realize its greatness,
Leading and
Accompanying me in life.
Though I possess
No worthiness
To receive
This noble state,
Thou, becoming
My qualification,
Dost live in me
Each day.
As I stand before thee,
Bereft of words
To express
My gratitude,
I shall guard
That mukti thou bestowed,
And in the end
Reach thy sacred feet.
Gurukulam, 20-12-2021, 11.15 p.m.
BT Song 1319
See: Mayaless Maya
BT Song 1319: Maya
Simple English Version
Once we understand that nothing is Maya,
Everything will work out for our good.
We should first realize this:
Even Maya itself is Maya.
Tell me, what is Maya:
The world, this body, or this breath?
As they all change and don’t stay the same,
They are not Maya, understand this.
Imposing one negative
Thought on Maya
And blaming it,
Why should we lament about Maya?
From what have we run away,
Calling it Maya?
Loving inwardly and lamenting outwardly,
This alone is Maya.
We should first understand
The real meaning of Maya.
Not staying permanently forever,
That which changes alone is Maya.
So, removing all the negative thoughts about Maya,
Not lamenting about it unnecessarily,
Even though it changes its form but stays permanently,
Is the nature of Maya; realizing this, let us continue to live.
Gurukulam, 1-1-2022, 11.15 p.m.
BT Song 1319 The Illusion
Classical English
Stanza 1
When we perceive that naught is illusion,
And all doth work unto our good,
We should first grasp this true conclusion,
That even illusion is but an illusion.
Stanza 2
Tell me, which is the true illusion—
The world, this body, or breath so fleeting?
For they all change and are not the same,
They are not illusion; this we must discern.
Stanza 3
Imposing negative thought on illusion,
And blaming it for our lamenting,
Why should we mourn this transient life,
When illusion itself is merely illusion?
Stanza 4
From which we have fled, calling it illusion,
Embracing it within, and lamenting without,
This alone is true illusion,
For true illusion is but living in delusion.
Stanza 5
We must first understand the true meaning of illusion,
That which is not eternal and changes swiftly,
This alone is illusion;
Realize this, and let us live accordingly.
Stanza 6
Thus, removing all negative thoughts of illusion,
Not lamenting it needlessly,
Though it may change form, yet it remains—
This is the nature of illusion; knowing this, let us live on.
Kuru Kulam, 1-1-2022, Evening 11:15
BT Song 1320
The concept of Time holds a dominant place in the Indian worldview. Regardless of one’s hard work or divine grace, nothing will proceed as expected unless Time cooperates. This is especially true in old age when we rely on others for our physical movements, making our ordeal even greater. During such times, the concept of Time becomes crucial in coping with the reality of life for many Indians. However, as a devotee of the Lord, my fellowship with Him helps me navigate the realities of old age, particularly in caring for my mother.
BT Song 1320: Time
Simple English Version
If the proper
Time doesn’t come,
Even our shadow
Will leave us alone.
If there is no
Mutual need,
Relatives and friends
Will stay away.
Though this is
True in life,
Everyone’s shadow
Will follow them.
When we become
Crippled and unable to walk,
Where is the shadow
To follow us?
There is nothing
To complain about,
Once this becomes
The principle of life.
So, I said to
Accept whatever comes
And move forward
In life as much as possible.
But as my heart
Refuses to listen to me,
It began to ask
So many questions.
When I was stranded,
Not knowing the answer,
You also asked many questions
For your share.
When one question
Becomes the answer for another,
I gave up
Finding answers.
When I sit
And talk with you,
I realized that
Good time has come.
Gurukulam, 2-1-2022, 4.15 a.m.
BT Song 1320 Time
Classical English
Stanza 1
If proper time fails to arrive,
Even our shadow will forsake us,
For when time does not come,
Shadows too will depart from our side.
Stanza 2
Should there be no mutual need,
Relatives and friends will distance themselves,
Though this truth is evident in life,
Each shadow will inevitably seek its own.
Stanza 3
When we are crippled and unable to walk,
Where is the shadow that should follow?
There is nothing to lament in this,
Once this truth becomes the principle of life.
Stanza 4
Thus, I advised to accept what comes,
And to proceed forward in life,
Yet my heart, refusing to heed,
Begins to question with many inquiries.
Stanza 5
When I was left stranded and unsure,
You too asked many questions,
Each query seeking its own answer,
For your share of understanding.
Stanza 6
When one question answers another,
I surrendered to the quest,
For I could not find the answer,
To the multitude of inquiries.
Stanza 7
As I sat and conversed with you,
I realized, with ease,
That good time had arrived,
Unbidden and on its own accord.
Stanza 8
For when time itself is true,
Its nature remains unshaken,
All shadows and doubts dissolve,
And time’s virtue becomes clear.
Stanza 9
We must embrace time’s course,
Not resisting its flow or change,
Thus, we shall find our way,
And shadows will follow in their turn.
Stanza 10
So let us welcome time’s passage,
With patience and fortitude,
For in its own measure and rhythm,
Good fortune and clarity shall be revealed.
Gurukulam, 2-1-2022, Morning 4:15
BT Song 1316 எது வேண்டும்
Stanza 1
துதிப்பாடல் பாடி
வெகுநாள் ஆச்சு
புலம்புதல் எனக்குப்
பழகியும் போச்சு
Stanza 2
புலம்பலே உனக்கு
துதியாக இருந்தாலும்
அதுவும் எனக்கு
அலுத்து போச்சு
Stanza 3
துதிக்க ஆயத்தம்
ஆகி வந்தேன்
பலவிதம் உன்னை
துதிக்கவும் பார்த்தேன்
Stanza 4
ஆயினும் இப்போது
உள்ள நிலையை
எண்ணி உன்னைத்
துதிக்க மறந்தேன்
Stanza 5
நிலமையை மாற்ற
உன்னிடம் கேட்டேன்
அதற்கான காரணம்
அனைத்தையும் சொன்னேன்
Stanza 6
இதற்குமேல் செய்ய
இயலாது என்று
நீயுமே சொல்ல
வெகுண்டு நின்றேன்
Stanza 7
இயலாது என்ற
சொல் என்றும்
உனக்குப் பொருந்தாது
உணரனும் நீயும்
Stanza 8
இயலாமை தள்ளாமை
முடியாமை எல்லாம்
எனக்குள்ள உரிமை
நீயும் புரியணும்
Stanza 9
இதையும் உணர
மனிதனாய் வந்தாய்
எம்போல பாடுகள்
பட்டு உணர்ந்தாய்
Stanza 10
என்னதான் மனிதனாய்
நீயும் வந்தாலும்
இறைவன் என்பதை
என்னமாய் மறுத்தாய்
[எதற்காக மறந்தாய்]
Stanza 11
இத்தனை பேச்சு
எதற்காகக் கேட்கணும்
யார் நீ என்பதை
எதற்காக மறுக்கணும்
[எதற்காக மறக்கணும்]
Stanza 12
கேட்பதை அறிந்து
தருவது மட்டுமே
உனக்குள்ள கடமை
அதையும் புரியணும்
Stanza 13
இல்லாது போனால்
இதுபோன்ற பாடல்
மட்டும் என்வாயில்
துதியாக வந்திடும்
Stanza 14
அதுபோதும் என்று
நீயும் எண்ணினால்
வேறென்ன செய்ய
அதைத்தான் செய்யணும்
குருகுலம், 19-12-2021, காலை 5.00
BT Song 1317 இறைவனின் எதிர்பாடு
Stanza 1
ஊருக்கும் உலகுக்கும்
இறைவனாய் இருப்பது
எளிதான காரியம்
நானும் அறிவேன்
Stanza 2
உனக்கு மட்டும்
இறைவனாய் இருப்பது
எளிதல்ல என்பதை
மட்டும் உணர்ந்தேன்
Stanza 3
உண்மையில் உன்னைப்
படைத்ததற்காக
இப்போது நானும்
நொந்து கொள்கிறேன்
Stanza 4
ஆயினும் அதனால்
பயனில்லை என்று
எப்போதோ நானும்
உணர்ந்து கொண்டேன்
Stanza 5
இதுபோல ஏச்சு
பேச்சு எதையும்
இதுவரை நானும்
கேட்டதே இல்லை
Stanza 6
உனக்காய் மரித்து
உன்னை மீட்டு
ஒருவிதப் பயனை
நான்காண வில்லை
Stanza 7
அத்தோடு பாட்டு
எழுத நானும்
அனுமதி தந்தது
இப்போது தொல்லை
Stanza 8
உன்இனம் தன்னைப்
படைத்த பின்னே
பலமுறை நானும்
புலம்பிய போதும்
Stanza 9
உன்னை மட்டும்
படைத்ததற்காக
எத்தனை முறைதான்
அழவேண்டி உள்ளது
Stanza 10
சட்டென இதற்கு
முடிவு கட்ட
முடியாது என்பதால்
பொறுத்து கொண்டேன்
Stanza 11
எதுவரை நீயும்
போவாய் என்பதைப்
பொறுமையாய் இருந்து
பார்த்துக் கொள்கிறேன்
Stanza 12
எல்லாம் முடிந்து
இறுதியாய் நீயும்
என்னிடம் வரும்போது
மீதியைச் சொல்கிறேன்
Stanza 13
அதுவரை நீபோடும்
ஆட்டம் அதற்கும்
அப்போது தக்க
பதிலும் செய்கிறேன்
Stanza 14
இதைமட்டும் மனதில்
வைத்துக் கொண்டு
இனிமேலே எழுது
அதைமட்டும் சொல்கிறேன்
குருகுலம், 19-12-2021, காலை, 7.30
BT Song 1318 தேடித் தந்தாய்
Stanza 1
நாடிய முக்தியை
தேடியே தந்தாய்
நானறியாப் பல
நன்மைகள் செய்தாய்
Stanza 2
வாடிய பயிராய்
வாழ்ந்த போது
மேகமாய் வந்து
மீட்டு உய்த்தாய்
Stanza 3
அளவற்ற அந்த
அன்பின் பெருக்கை
உணர்வற்ற நானும்
உணர வில்லை
Stanza 4
கதியற்று நானும்
போய்விடாது, நீ
காத்த பின்னே
உணர்ந்து கொண்டேன்
Stanza 5
எண்ணில்லா மதங்கள்
அவற்றின் மறைகள்
தர முடியாத
தெளிவை நீயும்
Stanza 6
வாழ்ந்து காட்டி
எடுத்துக் கூறி
வாழும் வழியைப்
புரிய வைத்தாய்
Stanza 7
கூண்டுக் கிளியாய்
வாழ்ந்த தாலே
சிறை யிருப்பைப்
புரியா கிளிபோல்
Stanza 8
அறிய முடியா
அடிமைத் தனத்தில்
இருந்த என்னை
மீட்டு உய்த்தாய்
Stanza 9
வாழும் போதே
வாழும் வாழ்வில்
முக்தி அதனை
நானும் துய்க்க
Stanza 10
கூட இருந்து
நடத்திச் சென்று
அந்த மேன்மை
புரியச் செய்தாய்
Stanza 11
இந்த உயர்வை
அடையத் தகுதி
என்னில் ஏதும்
அற்ற போதும்
Stanza 12
எனது தகுதி
நீயும் ஆகி
என்னுள் தினமும்
வாழு கின்றாய்
Stanza 13
இதற்கு மேலும்
எடுத்துச் சொல்ல
சொற்கள் அற்று
நின்ற நானும்
Stanza 14
தந்த முக்தி
தன்னைக் காத்து
வந்து சேர்வேன்
பாதம் தன்னில்
குருகுலம், 20-12-2021, இரவு 11.15
BT Song 1319 மாயை
Stanza 1
ஏதும் மாயை இல்லையென உணர்ந்தால்
எல்லாம் நடக்கும் நன்மையாய்த் தன்னால்
மாயை என்பதே ஒரு மாயை என்பதை
நாமும் உணரனும் முதலில் மனதால்
Stanza 2
உலகோ, உடலோ, உயிரோ இதிலே
எதுதான் மாயை என்பதைச் சொல்லு
நிரந்தரம் இல்லாமல் மாறிடும் என்பதால்
மாயை இவையல்ல என்பதை உணரு
Stanza 3
எதிர்மறையான கருத்து ஒன்றை
மாயை மீது நாமும் திணித்து
வீணாக அதன்மீது பழியும் கூறி
எதற்காகப் புலம்பணும் மாயைப் பற்றி
[எதற்காகப் புலம்பணும் வாழ்க்கையைப் பற்றி]
Stanza 4
மாயை என்று கூறிய எதனை
மனதாரவிட்டு ஓடினோம் இதுவரை
உள்ளாக நேசித்து வெளியாகப் புலம்பி
வாழ்வது மட்டுமே உண்மையில் மாயை
Stanza 5
மாயை என்ற சொல்லுக்கு உள்ள
உண்மைப் பொருளை உணரனும் முதலில்
நிரந்தரம் இல்லாமல் உருமாறி விரைவில்
கடந்து செல்லும் ஒன்றுதான் மாயை
Stanza 6
ஆகவே எதிர்மறை எண்ணத்தை நீக்கி
உருமாறிச் சென்றாலும் அழியாத ஒன்றை
எண்ணி வீணாக மாயையாய் புலம்பாமல்
மாயையின் மாயையை அறிந்து வாழுங்கள்
குருகுலம், 1-1-2022, இரவு, 11.15
BT Song 1320 நேரம்
நேரம் காலம்
வாய்க்காது போனால்
நிழலும் நமைவிட்டு
நீங்கியே போகும் 1
தேவை ஒன்று
இல்லாது போனால்
உறவும் நட்பும்
விலகியே நிற்கும் 2
தன்நிழல் தன்னோடு
வந்திடும் என்பது
வாழ்வில் நிச்சயம்
ஆன போதும் 3
நடமாட முடியாது
முடங்கியே போனால்
கூடவே வந்திட
நிழலும் ஏது 4
குறைசொல்ல இதிலே
ஏதுமே இல்லை
வாழ்வின் நெறியென
இதுவான பின்னே 5
வருவதை ஏற்று
முடிந்ததைச் செய்து
வாழ்வை நகர்த்த
நானும் சொன்னேன் 6
ஆயினும் என்பேச்சை
ஏற்காத நெஞ்சமும்
ஆயிரம் கேள்வி
என்னையும் கேட்க 7
விடை அறியாது
தவித்து நிற்கையில்
உன்பங்காய் நீயும்
பலகேள்வி கேட்க 8
கேள்விக்குக் கேள்வி
பதிலாக மாற
பதில்தேடும் செயலை
நானும் விட்டேன் 9
உன்னுடன் அமர்ந்து
உறவாடும் போது
நல்ல நேரம்
வாய்ப்பதை உணர்ந்தேன் 10
குருகுலம் , 2-1-2022, காலை, 4.15
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